Kohua herättänyt kirjoitus (lukekaa!):
Over the past month (since I left Terrence) I?ve received several offers of dates and relationships from various men who read this blog. I?m not looking for a new boyfriend right now but it seems I should clarify what it is I look for in a man when I am, which will hopefully stem the flow of offers from guys who really don?t have it.
I am a very high-quality woman. I know that sounds arrogant, but let?s consider the facts:
* I?m slim (whereas 62% of American women age 20 to 74 are overweight)
* I?m attractive (my new picture has been rated more attractive than 86% of the women on Hot or Not -- and the women who upload their pictures are a self-selected sample that is probably already biased towards being more attractive than the general female population)
* I?m relatively young (whereas 82% of American adult women are over 30 years old)
* I?m intelligent (IQ tested at 145 when I was a child, which is 3 standard deviations above the mean -- higher than 99.85% of the population. Even if I?ve gotten dumber as I?ve aged I?m probably still at least a 130, which is higher than 97.5% of the population.)
* I?m educated (whereas 77% of American women do not have bachelor?s degrees)
* I have my financial shit together (no debt, perfect credit history, 6+ months living expenses saved, adequate insurance, self employed)
* I have a strong libido and love having sex (my lover *never* has to beg, unless it?s for me to let him get some sleep!)
* Most of my interests tend to be more popular with men than women: science fiction, libertarianism, blogging, politics, economics, guns, gambling, etc.
Given that self-improvement is an ongoing project of mine this list will continue to grow (I?m currently working on adding bilingual, very physically fit, well-traveled, higher income, and fantastic cook to the list). So even when ?relatively young? (an important criteria for most men) drops off that list, I should have added enough other things that my overall dating market value should remain the same or even improve.
The above list explains why I typically receive 50-100 (sometimes more) responses whenever I post personal ads. This is in addition to getting hit on almost every time I go out alone (and all that those men know about me is that they like the way I look, they don?t even know about all the other qualities I have that make me more appealing than most other women).
So, I have a *lot* of choices of men who want to date me. Given that, of course I choose to date only the highest quality men -- men who are also fit, attractive, intelligent, educated, financially successful, etc. I?m attracted to men from any race and a wide age range (21 to 50 or so) so the pool of men who meet those requirements is quite large, which allows me to add all sorts of additional restrictions if I want -- must be atheist, must be libertarian, must not want (more) children, must be financially independent or self-employed and available for frequent world travel, etc.
Some people scoffed at the long list of requirements in my personal ad last year. Yet in less than two weeks I found five men who met my listed requirements and wanted a relationship with me. If I were to put more time and effort into looking I could probably find hundreds of high-quality men who both met my standards and were interested in dating me too. I can be picky.
So, although I am not looking for a new boyfriend right now -- I am waiting until October, after I?ve decided where I want to live -- those are the factors that I (and many other women) keep in mind when assessing potential romantic relationships. Just having some interests in common is *far* from enough.
I realize that some of you will find this post depressing because you?ll realize that you don?t qualify as a high quality man and thus won?t be able to get a high quality woman. You have a few options:
1. Lower your standards and stop pursuing women who are out of your league. There are lots of fat single mothers out there who can?t find dates either.
2. Look in the developing world. If you?re literate with a home computer and an internet connection you are very wealthy compared to the rest of the world. Citizenship or legal permanent residency in a rich country makes you more attractive to women in poorer countries. Your value on the dating market is thus much higher there.
3. Self-improvement! I used to be a fat unattractive college dropout who couldn?t get her life together. Now I?m thin, attractive, and successfully self-employed after graduating. You can make yourself over into a higher-quality man capable of winning a higher-quality woman too.