Did feminism f--- up our love lives?
But perhaps Gottlieb has a point. She explains that, if it wasn't for feminism, she wouldn't be in this 40-and-single predicament that she's struggling with. And if it weren't for feminism, she'd never have to contemplate "settling" in the first place because she'd already be married.
"Here's what actually happened," she writes. "Empowerment somehow became synonymous with having impossible standards and disregarding the fact that, in real life, you can't get everything you want, when you want it, on your terms only. Which is exactly how many of us empowered ourselves out of a good mate."
Bianca Dye, a prominent radio presenter, author of Playing Hard To Get and self-proclaimed feminist, agrees with Gottlieb. She says that feminism has indeed f---ed up her love life. And she says that it's not only she who has felt feminism's wrath.
"The main issue for our relationships is that we want it both ways," she explains. "We want to be feminists in every other aspect of our lives except for our relationships. So I don't blame men for being confused. I know many hard-core feminists who, despite their ideals, still want the door to be opened and still want to a man to cook her dinner once in a while when she's had a hard day. I do pay my own bills but I still do want a man to take care of me when I have a migraine and occasionally smother me with love and attention. Just because I'm a feminist and I want equal pay, doesn't mean I don't want my boyfriend to do these things. And I don't see why we have to make a choice."
Jessica Valenti in Washington Post: “Where’s the Outrage?” (i.e. Donations)
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